A short story by Corey Sommers, WhiteboardSelling
(Any similarity to actual people or events is purely coincidental)
Vince and Marty were late.
“They should call it Hertz Always Lost”, said Vince D’Agosto, Senior Sales Executive for Quick-Tron Software, Central Region. Marty Finch, Vince’s Sales Engineer, didn’t respond. He was nervously playing out in his mind how he was going to demo Quick-Tron Enterprise Manager Suite version 7.1 to Ray Santullo, the CIO of AgraPharmaTech, one of the largest raw materials conglomerates in the world.
A lot was riding on the meeting with Ray. Quick-Tron had made the “short list” along with Microtechnisoft for a $2M dollar enterprise supply chain and logistics software project. And that meant two million little reasons for Marty to be sweating profusely despite the air conditioning blasting out of the vents of their rented Ford Taurus.
“Ah, there it is,” said Vince, relieved. He turned into the parking lot of a grey, nondescript, three-story building in a sprawling office complex just outside of Overland Park, Kansas. All the visitor spots were taken, so he pulled into a spot a hundred yards or so from the building entrance.
Vince took a deep breadth and shut off the engine. “You all set?”
“Yeah all set” murmured Marty without much conviction.
They stepped out into the sweltering Kansas summer heat. “It must be 75% humidity”, gasped Marty.
It could have been February for all Vince cared. Every hair was in place, his white dress shirt freshly-starched, and a bright sheen on his spotless Johnston & Murphy’s. By the time they reached the building lobby, Marty’s shirt was soaked through, perspiration dripping from his brow. Vince was the picture of composure.
Vince looked over at Marty and frowned. “What did I tell you about always wearing an undershirt, Marty,” snapped Vince. “You’re a mess”.
“Sorry Vince, unlike you I don’t have 3% body fat,” replied Marty sarcastically. I’ll be fine, just give me a few to cool down”, replied Marty.
“We don’t have a few pal, we’re already five minutes late,” said Vince under his breadth as they approached the reception desk. “Rule number one – NEVER be late,” he hissed.
“Not used to the heat, huh?” chuckled the grey-haired security guard at the reception desk as the two approached. Vince wasn’t amused. “Vince D’Agosto and Marty Finch with Quick-Tron to see Ray Santullo,”
“Ok, I’ll need your IDs and business cards”, grunted the guard. “Stand on the green line and look into the camera”, he continued.
This will take another five minutes, thought Vince.
“Are those laptops you’ve got there young man?” the guard asked Marty. “Yes, I’ve got two and he’s got one, they’re IBM T60s and overall I like them quite a….”
“Two??” interrupted Vince, glaring at Marty.
Marty was grinning ear to ear. “Yeah, I’m going to demo the live client – server connection. Ray won’t want to see a canned demo. Those guys at Microtechnisoft could never pull this off.”
Vince wasn’t convinced. “This better work”, he scowled. “Last time you got that blue screen of death, remember?”
“I tested it, don’t worry”, replied Marty dismissively.
“I’ll stop worrying when when Ray’s signature is on that purchase order,” Vince said. “That’s the difference between a sales guy and you tech weenies.”
The guard seemed amused watching Marty and Vince sparring. “Uh, gentlemen, sorry to interrupt, but I’ll need the serial numbers off all those machines you’ve got there. It’s company policy.”
Another five minutes, thought Vince. He could already feel the deal slipping away, and with it his dream of sitting on the beach in Bora Bora at Emperor’s Club.
“Ok, let me call Beatrice, Ray’s assistant”, said the guard once they had finished filling out a stack of triplicate forms for each of the laptops.
“Got her voice mail”, said the guard, without batting an eyelash. “Have a seat and I’ll try her again in another five minutes.”
Marty was clearly relieved. “Great, a chance to dry off.”
That put Vince over the edge. “A chance to dry off??!? You didn’t tell me about this laptop sign-in BS. You sales engineers are all the same. They should remove the word ‘sales’ from your business cards. It’s because of tech weenies like you that I’m going to have to go back to selling copiers to law firms and accountants.”
“Vince, this isn’t my fault, last time they didn’t…”
Vince cut him off. “It’s NEVER your fault Marty. You always have an excuse.”
“Marty, Vince, glad to see you again,” exclaimed Beatrice with a smile as she emerged from a secured double-doorway leading to the building’s interior. Beatrice was an attractive, well-dressed woman in her mid-forties. She smiled warmly at Vince as she approached.
“You know, you’re two lucky fellows. Ray is running long in another meeting. You dodged a bullet this time, you know Ray doesn’t like to be kept waiting by vendors,” chided Beatrice said as she badged them in through security.
“You see, no harm no foul”, Marty whispered to Vince.
“Quiet!” snapped Vince. “We’ll continue this discussion later.”
“I hope you’ve got a projector in one of those roller bags of yours, Marty,” said Beatrice as they entered the elevator.
“A projector?” stammered Marty. “Aren’t we in Darjeeling? It’s got a projector mounted on the ceiling.”
“No,” Beatrice said with a chuckle. “There’s a board meeting going on in Darjeeling all day today, I’ve had to move you to Earl Grey and there’s no projector in there.” Marty could almost feel Vince’s glance burning a hole through the back of his head as they rode the elevator up to the third floor.
“You know,” continued Beatrice, “they’ve got these projectors now that can slip right into your briefcase; I saw it in SkyMall on the airplane.”
“Beatrice,” said Vince with the most patronizing tone he could muster, “would there be any chance we could borrow a projector for our meeting with Ray?”
“Anything for you, Vince,” said Beatrice with a wink and smile. “I’m sure we can dig something out of the A/V closet. Let me see what I can come up with,” she continued as she escorted Vince and Marty into Earl Grey conference room.
With the conference room door close, Vince completely lost it. “Are you kidding me, Marty??? You bring eighteen frickin’ laptops but you forgot the projector????”
“Vince, listen, the airlines only allow one carry on now. I’ve got my overnight bag plus these two machines, and you know, you always tell me never to check bags, that it takes too long and holds you up. Plus which, we were supposed to be in Dajeer…”
Vince didn’t let him finish. “Marty, that’s enough. If we lose this deal it’s on you, do you hear me? If I have my way you’ll be surfing Monster.com or Dice.com or whatever the heck.com you tech dweebs use to find your next gig. There’s always an excuse with you demo jockeys.”
“I’m sure she’ll come up with something, it’ll all work out, relax man,” Marty pleaded.
Vince was done with him. Copiers or postage equipment, Vince thought to himself. I used to make pretty good money selling copiers ….
“Guys, I hit pay dirt”, exclaimed Beatrice as she wheeled a cart into the conference room carrying a huge black case. “It’s an oldie but a goodie, one of the first ones to hit the market. It’s Very reliable. We call her Big Bertha. ”
“Is Big Bertha 1024 by 768?” asked Marty meekly. He already knew the answer.
“Oh Marty, you know I don’t get into all those bits and bytes. All I know is that she’s got a power cord and she’s served us well over the years - just not recently. Now you boys have a good meeting. Ray will be along in just a few minutes,” said Beatrice as she closed the door behind her.
An exasperated Vince just sat there in dumbfounded silence.
Marty could sense that this was not going to end well for him. “Look, we’ll get through this,” he said as he struggled to move the relic onto the conference room table. He opened the box and just stared. The projector wasn’t just old; it belonged in a tech museum.
Luckily, there was a projector screen hanging on the far wall. Marty plugged in the projector, unloaded his laptops, and began to get set up. The projector was slow to power up, and after what seemed an eternity, a faded blue light appeared on the screen. Since the projector wasn’t level with the screen, the image looked like an inverted Mayan temple. Marty fumbled with Big Bertha’s adjustable height swivels but found one wasn’t functional. He pulled out a wad of tissue from his pocket and tried to prop up one side. Vince looked like he was going to hurl.
The door opened and in came Ray Santullo. Tall, well-dressed with salt-and-pepper hair and a deep gravelly voice, Ray was your quintessential, no nonsense c-level executive.
“Thanks for coming guys”, boomed Ray. “And Vince, thanks for golf last weekend, and thanks for letting me win.”
Vince came out of his coma.
“Ray, you beat me fair and square. You were on your game.”
Ray gave Vince one of those ‘yeah right’ looks. “Vince, come on now, I’ve been around the block a few times. I happen to know you’re a scratch golfer. That caddie you put me with told me you play Windy Brook every week.”
Vince swallowed hard. “But Ray, with my injury to my…”
Ray cut him off. “Vince, stop already, ok? I know the drill, its sales 101. So let’s get down to business. I’ve got a decision to make on this project by the end of the month. I’ve got budget to spend and a lot’s riding on this project. Your pilot went well in our European division but the team tells me your new version is services-intensive and a bit finicky. I need to understand how you can minimize my risk on this project. It’s got a lot of visibility and frankly I don’t need another failed software implementation.
Vince was about to speak when Marty blurted out, “Ray, I think you’re going to be very impressed with what we have to show you. I want you to see some of the new features of version 7.1. I just need to boot up these laptops and…”
“Marty, I don’t have time for demos,” interrupted Ray. “I already saw your 7.1 flash demo on your website. You know, the self-running one. You’re product is pretty slick, I’ll give you that. But so is Microtechnicsoft’s”’. We’ve already gone through the RFP process, and you both made the short list because you met all of our functional requirements. Now it’s going to come down to time-to-deploy, reducing risk, price, and overall total cost of ownership.”
Marty was dejected, and, once again, sweating profusely. Big Bertha’s fan was blasting hot air straight at him and his shirt was soaking through again.
Vince somehow mustered the strength to speak. “Ray, I couldn’t agree more. You know how Marty is. He get’s excited about what our products have done for our customers. But I think what I’m hearing is you’d like to know how Quick-Tron Enterprise is a lower-risk, lower-TCO proposition for AgrapharmaTech, is that right?
Ray was quickly losing patience. “That’s what I just said, Vince.”
Vince was persistent. “Listen Ray, I’ve got just a few slides that we customized for Agrapharmatec that in a very succinct way differentiate us from MicroTechnics at the level I think you are looking for. As you can imagine, we compete against them all the time. You’re decision will be an easy one once you see what I have to show you.”
“I’m all ears,” responded Ray with more than a tinge of skepticism. “But I’ll warn you, I’ve got another meeting in 15 minutes. Use your time wisely.”
“Ok. Marty, pull up the slide deck we customized for Ray.”
Marty looked confused. “You mean the one we worked on at Chili’s on the way over here from the airport?”
“Yeah Marty, THAT one,” replied Vince, the arteries in his temples pulsating along with his rapidly increasing heartbeat.
“Uh, Vince, we worked on that presentation on YOUR machine, remember?”
There was a blank stare on Vince’s face as the gears in his brain briefly stopped turning. He blinked a few times and then said calmly, “you’re absolutely right, Marty. Ray, let me just boot up my machine real quick and I’ll pull up these slides.”
“Sure,” murmured Ray as he plucked away at his Blackberry.
With I-Tunes, anti-virus, and everything else running on Vince’s Windows Vista machine, it was another five minutes before he pulled up the slide deck. He toggled over to the projector and stared at the screen in horror. The right and bottom third of the slide were cut off.
Ray looked up from his Blackberry with an amused grin. “Ha, you’ve got Big Bertha there, don’t you,” he chuckled. “I didn’t notice at first. She’s only eight hundred by six hundred.”
Ray and Vince continued to stare at the screen in shocked silence.
Ray pushed his chair back away from the table. “Listen guys, I’ve got to get to this other meeting. And besides, I’ve seen these slides.”
Vince did a double-take. “What was that, Ray?”
Ray was clearly aggravated and half-way to the door. “Guys, I said I’ve seen these slides. Maybe not this exact version, but pretty close to it. I had Microtechnisoft in here earlier this week. They got their hands on your slides, don’t ask me how, they probably just did a Google search. The presentation was in their PowerPoint template, so I had no idea they were your slides. They said, ‘this is how Quick-Tron will come at us.’ And then they debunked every point, and quite convincingly I must say.
Marty and Vince were speechless.
Ray headed for the door. “Guys, I’ve got to run. Frankly, this was a waste of my time. I’m not quite sure what I expected to hear from you, but it certainly wasn’t this. You’ll have my decision by Monday, but don’t hold your breath,” said Ray as he left the room.
EPILOGUE
Vince didn’t get the deal, and he didn’t go to club. He is now selling paper in Scranton, PA. Marty now works in the IT department for Quick-Tron configuring laptops.
Tags: death by powerpoint, enterprise sales, high technology sales, powerpoint presentations, presentation skills, sales enablement, sales methodology, sales process, sales readiness, sales skills, sales strategies, sales tools, sales training, software sales, whiteboard presentation, whiteboard selling, whiteboard story, whiteboard symposium
